Child Can't Deal With Criticism Parents Must Be Careful Talking
Many parents in how to educate children so that children can face criticism while maintaining a correct perception of this matter, a headache. Most families now have only one child, and some have only one child in the face of social life pressure.
So parents pour all their time and love into their children. Holding the child in the palm of your hand, for fear of being wronged, lays a hidden danger for the child to be unable to face criticism when faced with criticism.
Over time, parents will find that no matter what the parents say, the child goes in from the left ear to the right, especially when the child does something wrong, the parents criticize a few words, sometimes they don't listen, sometimes they even Crying.
I think that the criticism of my parents or others is wrong, and I am right, and I should not be criticized and blamed. As a result, many parents do not know how to communicate effectively with their children.
In fact, when the parents found that children can not address the critical discourse of the problem when should face it immediately. But many parents do not know how to communicate with their children.
It can not only let the child calmly accept and not resist, but also face the criticism squarely during this period, not to enter the left ear and exit the right ear. One of them is called the semantic effect.
Parents should be able to find in their lives that often some things are expressed in different words and have different feelings, and the messages conveyed are also very different.
When the expression is positive, it is easier for people to accept, and it can give people a greater sense of resonance; however, when it shows great negative content and negative and pessimistic emotions, it will be difficult for people to accept;
This is the beauty of semantic effects. That is to say, when expressing your own opinions or other emotions, you must grasp the degree and use different expressions to avoid the resistance of others and produce a better resonance effect.
Why Children Can't Face Criticism
The First Reason Is Unwillingness To Identify With Others
I believe that many parents will have such troubles, that is, children often refute the words of their parents, and in serious cases, they will even object to disagreeing with anyone's words and opinions, thinking that they are right.
This is a very normal manifestation. As children grow up, their self-awareness is constantly developing, and they will gradually begin to learn to distinguish whether the words of others are what they need or whether they are not deceived.
When a child has been deceived, his degree of agreement will be greatly reduced, and he is skeptical of other people's attitudes and opinions, so he does not care about other people's criticism.
If you don’t take it to heart, you will naturally think that other people’s criticism doesn’t matter, and it’s not right anyway, so you can’t criticize formally.
The Second Reason Is Unwillingness To Admit Mistakes
In people's subconscious, they will think that admitting the criticism of others is their own mistake, and only when they do something wrong will they be criticized and blamed by others.
Similarly, when it comes to children, they will also think that once they accept criticism from others outside themselves, they allow others to criticize themselves.
In the cognition of some children, this is absolutely not allowed to exist. Especially in the hearts of well-protected children who are protected by their parents, they are always protected, and everything is tolerated and tolerated by others, and sudden criticism will make children hit hard.
They believe too much in themselves, that the world revolves around them. There are also some children who are too inferior because their inner inferiority makes them lack a sense of security, and their awareness of protecting themselves will be very strong.
Too timid in the heart will suppress the criticism that they dare not look directly at the outside world, and cannot face the existence that makes themselves more inferior. Therefore, it is impossible to admit one's own mistakes, and over time, it becomes increasingly difficult to face up criticism.
How Parents Can Use Semantic Effects To Communicate Effectively With Their Children
When parents find that their children cannot face up to criticism, they will be eager to let their children correct their mentality quickly, but at this time, children are actually sensitive at heart, if parents preach at the level of criticism.
Children will be more disgusted with their parents' actions, thus greatly reducing children's sense of trust and security in their parents, resulting in children no longer actively communicating with their parents.
They can't even express their true thoughts, and the parent-child relationship is destroyed. Therefore, parents should learn to use semantic effects skillfully to help themselves and their children resolve this problem.
1. Reject Unfair Comparisons
Parents also come from the age of their children. They often say that they hate their elders to compare other children with themselves, and today's children also hate being compared for no reason.
In the process of comparison, children can realize the denial and criticism of their parents, because their own practices do not meet the needs of their parents, so parents will appreciate others deny themselves.
It seems to be just a random comparison, but in fact, it has already caused the children to start to divide their parents. Therefore, parents need to realize that unfair comparisons are to be abolished.
2. Calm Each Other's Emotions
In more extreme emotions, the words spoken are often very hurtful. Often parents and children cannot control their emotions. Even if the words are reasonable, they cannot accept each other's words.
This is a big taboo. Negative emotions will only make people lose their minds. When children have large negative emotions, they will only become more extreme and uncontrollable.
Therefore, parents must first stabilize their emotions, and then learn to live in peace with their children, respect what children say, and respect children's opinions and ideas. Always maintain a lighthearted atmosphere before or during reasoning with your child.
3. Learn Language Arts
Parents like to comment on everything about their children when they criticize their children and then impose requirements on their children according to their own ideas and requirements.
Conclusion
Children are reluctant to listen to the general teaching of leaders. It goes against the child's long-cherished wish. The child hopes to have verbal communication like a friend. Only this kind of communication can make the child willingly accept it and let go of his inner guard.
Children can't face criticism, parents should learn to change language art tactfully, and don't bite the bullet and communicate with their children. Stabilize the emotions of children and parents, communicate with each other calmly, and respect each other's opinions.
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