How To Get Along When Children Are Reluctant To Communicate?
Communication is the most important thing when dealing with people. Whether it is an adult or a child, as long as there are no barriers in communication, the relationship between two people can be particularly good.
Human language is very rich. In addition to the language that can be expressed orally, people's eyes, expressions, and actions can all be silent language. I believe in the process of children growing up slowly.
When we communicate with children, we always encounter some problems. For example, when the child is disobedient or when the child communicates with us, the child always fails to grasp the key points of the language we express. Marcus is four and a half years old this year. When I lived with him, he was always very obedient.
No matter what I say to her, he can listen carefully and do it carefully. However, when I leave the house for a period of time and ask his father to take him, his father reflects that there are many bad habits in the child.
For example, when his father asked him to do something, he didn't pay attention at all. When his father communicated with him, he always failed to grasp the key points, which made his father very distressed. His father thinks there may be some problems with the child's comprehension.
But I told the child's father that the child was always obedient when I was taking care of the child, and he always expressed his opinion to me. So what is the difference between me and my husband when we have children? Why does the child only listen to me and not to him?
Problems With The Expression Of The Parents
Problem 1. The Purpose Of The Expression Is Not Clear
Whether we are communicating with children or adults, in order for the other person to understand our needs, we must clearly express our purpose to the other person. Why does the child never listen to the child's father when he communicates with the child?
That's because he didn't express his purpose at all when communicating with the child. The child listened to nothing, and naturally, he was unwilling to pay attention to his father.
Problem 2. Not Communicating With Children From The Perspective Of Children
I believe that when we are studying and working, one of the things we hate the most is that teachers or tour leaders use their arrogant identities to pressure us to do something. When we communicate with children, we do not think from the perspective of children.
But as an elder, ordering the child will naturally produce some rebellious emotions. In order to make children listen to us obediently, when we communicate with children, we must communicate with children from the perspective of children.
What To Keep In Mind When Communicating With Children
Item 1. Repeated Emphasis On Key Words
We all know that a four-and-a-half-year-old child is not very understanding, and their logic is not very clear. When we say something to them, if we don’t repeat the keywords a few times, then they can’t remember what the purpose of the thing we want to express is?
What if we told our kids where to go to play this afternoon? Then we have to repeat the time and place to go out to the children several times, let the children remember the time to go out to play and prepare for going out to play in advance.
Item 2. Respect The Child's Choice
When communicating with children, why do children have some rebellious emotions and like to fight against us? Most of this is because we don't respect our children's choices.
When communicating with children, we must give children the right to choose, for example, let them choose to play in the park or play with children in the community.
We must let children have the right to choose, and children will be interested in the language of their parents. When children hear that their parents are starting to respect their choices, they also listen to their parents and actively express their opinions.
A child who knows how to express his own opinions will become a very assertive person when he grows up. I believe that making children independent and not being led by others' language is what every parent wants to see most.
Item 3. Solve Problems More And Argue Less
No matter what age you are communicating with your child, there will always be some differences of opinion between the child and ours. When there are some differences between children and our views, we must not use our own language to force children to agree with our views.
When communicating with children, what we can do more is to find the places where the children's views are the same as ours, so as to seek common ground while reserving differences. When the child's point of view is different from ours, we have to try our best to solve this problem, instead of using our own language to conquer the child all the time.
When children find that they are communicating with their parents, they have been forced by their parents to agree with a certain thing.
Item 3. Guide Children To Think About What We Say
When communicating with children, guide children to think about what we say, which can exercise children's brain response-ability. When communicating with children, let them have space to think, and let them tell us the answers after thinking.
This will not only improve children's attention when listening to us but also help children grow up to think about what other people or teachers say and make them good people.
Conclusion
As children grow up, we will inevitably find that children have problems of one kind or another. When children grow up, they will also appear rebellious. When they start to no longer want to listen to us because of certain things or certain viewpoints, we must start to learn to reflect on the way we communicate with our children. When communicating with children, if you find the right way, the children will naturally become well-behaved and sensible.
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