When A Child Hits Someone What Should Parents Do?

When I got home today, my grandmother told me that the kindergarten teacher was looking for the parents again, because Albern always caused trouble for the teacher during this period of time, either beating up the little friend or biting others.

And every reason. Although the bite is not deep, it is also very troublesome for teachers and friends. His father was very angry and beat Albern violently as a punishment, hoping that Albern could change.

Albern's beating and biting behavior always seem to happen to him. When encountering such a child who is always in trouble, perhaps the parents can only beat and scold them to truly deter them.

In life, many parents also meet children like my Albern. In fact, there are reasons behind the behavior of children, and there are some internal reasons behind each behavior.

The Reason Behind The Child Who Hits And Bites

There is a difference between children and adults, their world is very simple, there are not so many right and wrong. But why is there still beating and biting behavior?

Reason 1: Parents Are Too Violent

Imitation is the first step for children to learn, so some beating and biting behaviors are sometimes influenced by their parents. For example, parents are always arguing, and even do it in front of their children.

And when parents discipline their children, they always use violence. Let children grow up with violence in their childhood and environment, and they will think that violence is the only way to solve problems.

Reason 2: Don't Know How To Solve The Problem

The behavior of children always hitting and biting people is often a way for parents to consider that it may be a way for children to interact with people. That is to say, parents do not pay attention to the development of social skills in education, and children do not know how to communicate. 

When conflicts arise with partners, they do not know how to resolve them amicably. They don't understand humility and negotiation, so hitting and biting people has become the most direct way for them to solve problems.

Reason 3: Parents Are Always "Protecting The Calf" In Life

There are some parents in life who always turn a blind eye to their children's mistakes and only blame others. This kind of "calf-protecting" education is bound to raise some arrogant and unreasonable "bear children". 

These children always have some extreme behaviors, because their parents' shelter and connivance have created their willfulness and unreasonableness, biting and beating others.

Reason 4: Learn From The Friends Around You

Some of the friends are biting and hitting people. Some children will imitate the behavior of partners, so not only parents can influence children, but some children with bad behavior can also influence children.

Reason 5: Poor Self- Control And Uncontrollable Emotions

Children's mood swings are high, which is related to their poor self-control. When children encounter themselves dissatisfied, unhappy, or wronged, they will use beating and biting behaviors to vent. 

This venting is due to their lack of self-control, so it is inevitable that they will do some extreme behaviors.

Reason 6: The "Oral Period" Before The Age Of 3 Is At Play

Biting is associated with the "oral period". It usually appears within 2-6 months, and some may persist before the age of 3. Children at this time like to explore the things around them with their mouths. 

They like to touch and see and bite to perceive the difference. But generally, this occurs in children before the age of 3, so parents must pay attention to the age group.

How Parents Can Deal With Children's Hitting And Biting Behaviors

When there is beating or biting behavior, parents should not use their own wrong ways to deal with it. Because beating, scolding and accusing may be able to control the child at the time, it is not a good way to educate the child for a long time.

If you want to guide the parents reasonably and correctly, you can do it according to the following methods.

Point 1: Guidance — Learn To Resolve Conflicts The Right Way

Guide children to learn to resolve conflicts. When children use the wrong method, tell them that this method is wrong. When there is a conflict between your own opinions and others, you know how to use the negotiation method to find a suitable solution.

When dealing with others, you must express your own thoughts, respect the thoughts of others, and be able to distinguish right from wrong. In line with the principle of the minority obeying the majority, getting along and interacting with partners is also a good way to correctly resolve conflicts.

Point 2: Empathy - Knowing How To Change Your Behavior With Empathy

Educate children about beating and biting behaviors, so that children can feel empathy and know-how to think about the partner who is bitten or beaten. Think about how painful it would be if it were yourself. Use this empathy to make them understand that hitting, biting, and hurting others is wrong. Children can also deeply understand why hitting and biting are not acceptable.

Point 3: Substitute - Prepare Something To Bite Into

For the children in the "oral period", prepare something for them to bite, so that they can bite at will. Satisfy their inner desire to explore, so that when the heart is satisfied, they don't bite.

Point 4: Change - Replacing The Education Of Violence With Education Of Love

Don't always try to use violent education to manage children very honestly. In fact, sometimes parents can manage their children without hitting or scolding.

Although education requires a combination of rewards and punishments, the strategy of beating and scolding can be changed in terms of punishment, and beating and scolding can be turned into appropriate punishments, such as punishing children for not going out to play or buying toys. Such punishment is much better than corporal punishment.

Your Best Message Mom

Once this behavior is not stopped, it will bring a lot of trouble to parents and other children. If you want to change the behavior of your children, parents must change themselves.

Then stimulate the children's empathy, let them know how to think about those who have been hurt, and have a deeper understanding of the behavior of hitting and biting people is not correct. After knowing the mistake of this behavior, teaching the child the skills of interpersonal communication and problem-solving is the best education for parents to correctly deal with this wrong behavior, and the child will become better.

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